The 10 Most Annoying Cat Habits

  1. Their absolute need to lay down on whatever reading material you have in front of you.
  2. Their ability to detect the most minute amount of meat-related substance in the trash, and their need to knock it over and fully investigate.
  3. When they stare intensely at a spot where there is nothing you can see, keeping a sentry for long periods, leaving you completely convinced there are ghosts in the house.
  4. Their total refusal to do that extremely cute thing they ALWAYS do when someone from outside the household is there to see it.
  5. When they are desperate for food, and you are going to feed them—the way they need to walk very slowly just in front of you, to make sure you don’t change your mind, making you trip every time.
  6. The way they will eat random substances that are bad for them, like rubber bands or tinsel, but will fight to the death not to take helpful medication.
  7. Their need to show you how disgusting the off-brand food you gave them is by pretending it’s something in their litter box and repeatedly pantomiming that they are burying it.
  8. Their magnetic attraction to anyone who doesn’t like cats, shown by affection to them that is truly over the top, when you some days barely get a second glance.
  9. Their dire need to wash their most personal parts when you are trying to show said non-cat-lovers how adorable cats are.
  10. Their insistence on having a shorter lifespan than your own, leaving you one day to miss them forever.